"90 Day Fiance" fans met Lisa and Usman in season 4 of "Before The 90 Days." Blasting News reported back in March that many fans likened Lisa to Angela Deem. However, our article noted that similarities seem to end with a penchant for swear words and the fact they are much older than their Nigerian partners. Actually, they seem quite different in many ways. Where Angela Deem gets angry with Michael Ilesanmi for keeping secrets from her, Lisa acts almost obsessive with her jealousy of Usman's friends and female acquaintances.
Is The Couples Therapist, Kirk authentic?
If you never heard of Dr. Kirk Honda before, here are some details about his authenticity. Over on the Antioch University of Seattle website, his professional profile shows he's on the faculty in the psychology department. With a number of awards behind him and a specialist with qualifications as an MA and a PsyD, he specializes in "Couples and Family Therapy." Dr. Kirk Honda also runs his YouTube channel, named "Psychology In Seattle." There, he sometimes discusses Reality TV shows like "Love is Blind."
Recently, he started discussing and analyzing some of the couples from "90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days." Independent from the show, and with simple explanations into his findings, fans of the TLC show can easily follow his reasoning.
So, he went through Darcey Silva and Tom, plus Jesse Meester. He also discussed Big Ed and Rosemarie a couple of times. On April 25, he took a look at Lisa and Usman in episode 2. In that episode, she told Usman she wouldn't tolerate him hanging with friends or female acquaintances.
Lisa of '90 Day Fiance' seems 'controlling' with Usman
Dr. Kirk explained a few scenes as he played them back on his YouTube. He started off with Lisa, saying that she got hurt before. And, it worries her that Usman might cheat on her. It came after a drama she made on Facebook about his female acquaintances. Well, as Kirk says, it's natural to "feel a bit fearful if you've been hurt before." But, instead of trying to control his social media, he felt that Lisa should explain her fears to Usman, rather than dictating.
Actually, at one stage, Lisa tells Usman she won't "tolerate' him hanging with his friends and female acquaintances. That seemed an area of concern for the Couples Therapist. After watching the snippet from the "90 Day Fiance" episode, he explained why he felt Lisa could push Usman away. After all, she's actually going to Nigeria where she'll be his guest. But before she even arrived, she's making demands.
Demanding Lisa could try a more subtle approach
Dr. Kirk noted that Usman seems "onboard" and even tries "pushing back on some of her controlling behaviors." Of course, the question of choosing a foreign partner in the show gets raised by most fans who watch it. He questions, does anyone ever feel they're "being exploited?" But without sitting them down and talking to him, he can't comment further on that aspect of Lisa and Usman.
Nevertheless, it becomes clear Lisa's trying to control Usman when she demands his friends to stay away from him.
In that snippet, Lisa said to Usman, "Somebody called you! Was it a female?" That came after his call dropped briefly. Usman said he doesn't "want any drama." So, she said, "Baby Love, when I come, I'm not gonna have a hundred people surrounding us all day long." Then, the "90 Day Fiance" star added, "I don't want all your friends hanging.around." Then, she said that one of her conditions when she gets to Nigeria, is that he "must be by [her] side 24 hours."
Is Lisa's attitude 'abusive?'
Kirk, the Couples Therapist, looked concerned when Lisa said that. He told his fans that Usman's face "says it all." Then he added, What?
She's already dictating what is gonna happen." Dr, Kirk said that he "understand her anxiety." But, her "solution of control is not enjoyed by me." Plus, he noted, it's "sure not enjoyed" by Usman. From that scene, Kirk took away that this "is a classic, abusive, high-control relationship tactic."
Lisa seems to be abusive in that she wants to "separate" Usman from his "support system." Dr. Kirk also feels that there's "an ominous tone" to Lisa demanding, "You're gonna be around me 24/7." He felt that "in the context, she's saying that, it's very concerning."
What did you think of Dr. Kirk Honda feeling that not only could Lisa's "controlling" ways push Usman away but that her classic "abusive" approach is actually "concerning."
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