The grammar of love is key to understanding what love is. No one can define any aspect of our being with complete accuracy. The current emphasis is on parts of the brain which respond to different stimuli. The neural investigation may help explain things that have happened. Naming elements that exist and have a power within us always remains inexact.
We are within our rights to say that love is a Noun. It is an energy within us that combines with will and freedom to fasten onto targets.
Not too felicitous
It may seem boorish to suggest that love, will, and freedom aim at targets like a weapon.
But when you think about it, that's what happens. Freedom leads to choices. Will creates movement. And love is the energy that gets transported.
So, what is the energy?
It is the energy of unification. It is the impulse to be one with an object. Unification is the fulfillment of the social urge and love is the name of the energy that gets from here to there. In the deepest sense unification is beyond us all. But we are impelled to seek it.
The irony of existence is that we are individuals when it comes to deciding things and acting but we have an urge to be one with others in various ways. Context is utterly key to determining the actual fate of love.
Values always tell the tale
The narcissist cannot unify with someone else.
Thus the energy of love is turned upon the self. The exclusivist will gravitate to “their own kind.” The pathological may masquerade. Is any of this controllable? To the extent that we can control anything, we can at least say love can be good.
Stepping stones to love that works
Something that works can be good all around. The Stepping Stones that work for love include unselfishness and a capacity for self-criticism.
All benefit from being tolerant, helpful and democratic. Valuing community is a good step. Love cannot thrive unless it is consciously infused with the better values.
Energy before poetry
We are all poets and love is the theme of most poems. That longing for unity grabs us. The notes and rhythms of unification are irresistible.
But in the end, other values including justice and fairness, nonviolence and a helping hand are the key to whether the energy is well used. Unfortunately, these broader contexts do not seem to gather momentum.
Unification can be for a brief instant as in some mystical experiences, or it can be a sense that colors all one’s perceptions. Love that has a universal element may well be what is called for today. Love as an energy lights up and functions well within a universal frame.