Why genuine friendships require a lot of effort

When you were still a child, you practically made friends with everyone. You played with your classmates at school, your playmate down the street, and even your next-door neighbor. Being kids, we held no reservations. We were comfortable with the people around us and we were happy. As we go through the process of growing up, that's where the trouble starts.

By middle school or high school, you probably belonged to a certain group.

This type of friendship is formed based on your shared interests and characteristics. What most of us don't know is that these factors are bound to change over time.

When we reach college, we learn that a Lot of what went on during our early days as kids was just the start of a rough adventure. In this period of our lives, we explore ourselves and other people we meet along the way. This is what's fun about college: the adventures and the new people we encounter.

Once we've closed this chapter in our lives, we move on to the "adulting" stage. We're so engrossed in our lives that we can't even take time to evaluate our relationships with friends.

Now, once you've taken some time to recover from being an adult, that's where you start to realize who your friends are: those who waited and stayed with you.

Some may coin it as low-maintenance friendships. HelloGiggles talks about why friendships need a lot of work and I'd have to agree on this. My entire point in this matter is, why is it that they stayed and others left? Real friends stay with you because:

They have a higher emotional intelligence than most people

They are aware of their own emotions and they make it a point to tell you how they feel. If you suddenly went MIA on them, don't expect them to yell at you through social media or a text message. They're going to invite you for brunch.

If you're still unavailable, they're going to drag you out of your house just to spend time with you. That's when they'll tell you they miss you and they want you back in their lives.

They're considerate human beings

The conversation hasn't even started but it's like they just get you. It's not telepathy but it's close to having an authentic emotional connection with another person. When you're not feeling well or you have a bad day, they won't ask if you're okay. They'll just hug you real tight and wait for you to start talking.

They intend to make things work

No matter what your problem is, they'll be there for you. If you ghosted them twice already, they'll still show up if you call them. They won't give up on you, even if you've missed your weekly gatherings for six months.