Somewhere in Manhattan, Ivanka Trump is laughing so hard she has tears streaming down her face. Nordstrom, the luxury retailer that yanked Ivanka's eponymous fashion line from store shelves allegedly because of poor sales, is now selling "Clear Knee Mom Jeans"-- $95 high-waisted jeans with clear plastic knee panels for those busy, yet fashion-conscious, soccer moms on the go who have been longing to show off their patellas but were concerned about exposure to the elements.
Some Twitter users believe that the Apocalypse is upon us
"Slick plastic panels bare your knees for a futuristic feel in tappered [sic] and cropped high-waist jeans," the reads the product description on Nordstrom's Topshop website.
While these jeans, which combine the aesthetic appeal of a rain poncho with a pair of mid-1980s Jordaches, have a five-star rating on Nordstrom, the peculiar clothing item has ignited a firestorm of bipartisan online ridicule.
Topshop's Clear Knee Mom Jeans are the surest sign yet of impending Armageddon. https://t.co/XPcfImuGvT pic.twitter.com/KHZKEagFti
— Christopher Sprigman (@CJSprigman) March 13, 2017
Some Twitter users have theorized that the appearance of clear-knee mom jeans signifies the beginning of the Apocalypse, while others couldn't make up their minds whether or not this was an actual Nordstrom product or an April Fool's joke that came a few weeks too early.
You guys. Wtffffffff is this? Am I hallucinating? https://t.co/jWeBcy8mxr
— Leah, agirlandaboy (@agirlandaboy) March 13, 2017
One particularly optimistic Twitter user chose to see the glass as half full, however, using the ridiculous jeans as the basis of a motivational message.
"Next time you think you're failing," tweeted @AnxiousGrlGuide, "remember that someone thought mom jeans w/ clear knee panels was a good idea."
Next time you think you're failing, remember that someone thought mom jeans w/ clear knee panels was a good idea pic.twitter.com/ERTvqhBJE2
— Anxiety Girl (@AnxiousGrlGuide) March 13, 2017
No comment yet from Ivanka
Meanwhile, the world waits with bated breath to see just what Ivanka Trump has to say about this deplorable Nordstrom product offering.
Chances are that she won't lose much sleep over the retailer's decision, however; earlier this month Abigail Klem, who oversees the Ivanka Trump fashion brand, reported that sales have soared by a mind-blowing 346 percent ever since Nordstrom made the decision to stop selling them.
“For several different retailers Ivanka Trump was a top performer online, and in some of the categories it was the best performance ever,” said Klem to fashion website Refinery29 in early March.
