Why Not Just Adopt?
It is estimated that almost 1 out of 10 couples in the United States suffer from infertility. Depending on the cause of infertility, the cost of treatments can range anywhere from hundreds to thousands of dollars. With significant advances in technology, many couples are now able to conceive through In Vitro Fertilization or IVF. The procedure can start around $10,000 per cycle and can add up to an infinite level of financial burdens if a couple chooses or needs to attempt this treatment several times. Often, we hear people criticize these treatments because of the amount of money that the individuals choose to spend on them.
Many of us may have had the thought, "why not just adopt?" - "so many children need homes!". What most do not understand, however, is that the adoption process is no more simple or inexpensive than the invasive fertility treatments that many of these couples have already endured.
Adoption Is Expensive
Whether you choose to adopt an infant in the U.S. or internationally, adoption fees typically average at around $30,000. While many couples will be eligible for a U.S. tax credit of up to $13,190 per child, they will still be left with a heavy financial burden. While some prefer the adoption route immediately after learning about their difficulty to conceive, most choose this option after all means of getting pregnant on their own have failed.
Typically, most have already spent what they can on trying to become pregnant before realizing that even more money will be needed if they decide adoption is the next step.
The Process Is Long and Difficult
The process of which a couple needs to go through to adopt a child is anything but simple. While anyone can understand why this process should not be without effort, persons proceeding with adoption will need to be prepared for a long and emotional process.
Home studies, character references, applications and background checks, are just the beginning of starting the process of gaining a child into your home. After approval is gained, a finalization hearing must be conducted by a judge to be granted legal custody of the child.
The Birth Mother May Change Her Mind
Once the adoption has been finalized by the courts, there is very little that a birth mother can do to reverse it.
However, depending on the type of adoption, she has plenty of time to change her mind before then; even up to the day she gives birth. The decision for a woman to give her child up for adoption is an emotional roller coaster of it's own and it should not be difficult to understand how they may change their mind during the process. This is a heartbreaking experience for any couple that has their heart set on finally being able to start a family. Statistics have shown that a birth mother is less likely to make this decision while in her third trimester, but there are countless stories about prospective parents that have been let down by a birth mother changing her mind at the last minute.
Be Sensitive To Those Trying to Start A Family
If you have never experienced infertility, it can be difficult to grasp just what a difficult and trying time it can be for a couple that desperately wants to start a family. Unless you have experienced this hardship for yourself, it is best not to judge friends or family members that choose to spend large amounts of money to start a family. Next time you have the urge to ask someone why they won't "just adopt", remember that it is not just as straightforward as walking into an orphanage on a Saturday morning, and walking out with a baby in your arms that afternoon.
