Nike, the athletic monolith of swooshes, highly paid athletes and overpriced gear, had a big unveiling last week. While not quite as overdone as launches of new Apple products, it was a media blitz better left for a medical breakthrough instead of a campaign for a new running shoe.

If the new design works properly, runners unable to properly tie their shoelaces will never trip again. And tired runners will never be able to use to excuse of a loose or untied shoelace to stop for a rest. If, of course, they’re wearing the new Nike running shoe.

The new Nike shoe is called the HyperAdapt Trainor 1.0.

Of course, it is. It’s a perfect name, a combination or words with myriad definitions individually and that together can mean anything. But isn’t the 1.0 designation, version 1.0, old already? Or maybe the combination name is perfect for what seems to be Nike’s demographic — millennials?

No shoelaces, no price yet

Mark Parker, the Nike CEO, introduced the shoe a select group of media (no one I know was invited) in New York. While the shoe’s price wasn’t announced, Parker noted the newfangled product is “powered by an underfoot-lacing mechanism.” It will be available to the public this holiday season. If there’s one thing Nike does best, it’s marketing its products to their full potential.

There’s little doubt the shoe will sell well, but what a shame.

One of the marketing descriptions for the new product is that it “purposes a groundbreaking solution to the individual idiosyncrasies in lacing.” How’s that for creative copy writing? What exactly is Nike trying to say?

Running is simple with shoelaces

More important, tying shoelaces, whether it’s before a basketball game or a marathon, is part of the appealing simplicity of many sports.

Running’s few requirements are part of its joy. Shirt, shorts, socks and shoes are the usual requirements.

The pre-race ritual of tying one's shoes for a training run or a race is part of the welcomed routine, right? It’s always been that way for me, whether I tie my shoes properly or not. It’s time, however briefly, for reflecting on the pending run.

According to Nike, the shoes are battery operated. When a wearer pushes the plus sign button, the shoes tighten via a sensor. The minus sign button releases the laces. A full charge takes about three hours, which Nike says will last two weeks.

Nike says it’s been working on the concept for years, but I don’t care and never will. Regardless of price, the next great trend in running shoes is not for me. I’ll tie my own running shoe shoelaces and re-tie my own laces of I don’t do it properly the first time. It’s part of the running experience I want to do for myself.

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