#Donald Trump, flanked by "Apprentice villain" and ordained Baptist minister Omarosa to his left, a wacked out #Don King to his rear looking dressed somewhere between Napoleon and a denim-laden Bandidos biker, and behind Pastor Darrel Scott who says he likes Trump’s “swag,” stood patiently while Scott’s wife led a group prayer asking the Almighty to anoint him to lead the nation. God help us all indeed.

In one of Trump’s more peculiar public appearances on the campaign trail, the billionaire businessman (and evidently the target of Beelzebub himself), made a showing Wednesday at the Midwest Vision and Values Pastors Leadership Conference in Ohio. Among other things, the conference featured the flamboyant Don King accidentally using the N-word and a self-identified apostle and prophet who claimed he single-handedly stopped a tsunami from ravaging Hawaii.

Now if he could just do something about the fact a dozen eggs cost over $5.00 in Honolulu, I would be a believer.

Satan has Trump in his sights?

Scott, an evangelical pastor, spoke to the crowd at Cleveland’s New Spirit Revival Center, recounting a story where “a great preacher who is nationally known” once told Trump years ago that if he chose to run for president, there would be a “concentrated, Satanic attack” against him, Scott said as his entourage bobbled their heads with approval.

Scott reminded Trump that the preacher warned him of “a demon, principalities and powers that are going to war against you on a level that you’ve never seen before,” adding that the prophecy has undoubtedly come true, since Scott has been “watching it every day.” Actually, that’s just Fox News, but we’ll excuse the bungle.

Prayer for Trump to be appointed, or anointed, or something like that

Scott’s wife then takes Trump’s hands, while others lay their palms on the GOP nominee as if he was some sort of miracle-decanting lightning rod of Holy Spirit, and asks the Lord to “touch this man Donald J. Trump” and “give him the anointing to lead this nation.” Rumors that Trump was instantly cured of bigotry, racism, xenophobia and rampant refugee hatred proved to be untrue.

Meanwhile, Trump, a proven non-spiritual man who tries very hard to paint himself as a pious zealot (when voters suit him that is), looked completely in discomfort while he was enduring the prayer. “Jesus, when is this going to end,” he likely was saying.

Of course, many would say that Trump himself is not being attacked by Satan because you know, why would the Devil attack an ally? As one commenter on the YouTube video succinctly pointed out: “Trump isn't facing a Satanic attack, he's been willingly possessed for decades and has become the manifestation thereof.”

And for our next act...

As a sidekick laugh, we also had minor prophet Frank Amedia (his writings almost made it between the books of Micah and Nahum before being edited out) who told a story about how in 2011 the power of his prayer stopped a raging tsunami from obliterating a Hawaiian Island where his daughter was vacationing.

For the record, that’s the same earthquake and tsunami that took nearly 16,000 lives, but who’s counting?